Dear Mall Kiosk Workers…

Dear Mall Kiosk Workers,

This is not meant as a complaint letter. No, it’s more of a plea for understanding; for compassion, upon us mom mall shoppers, esp with tots in tow, and  more so that it is the holiday season.

Now, I know your job is not the most stellar of occupations. I understand that you need to get people to come over to your kiosk and hopefully, buy your product. As someone who has worked in marketing for over 15 years, I really do “get” what you have to do.

But PLEASE, don’t ask me “a quick question” when you see me trying to wrangle my tot away from the up escalator. Or see me pushing the stroller that’s piled high with teetering bags and a crying babe. Or notice that I’m trying my best not to notice you because I’ve already scouted out your wares several yards ahead and I’m doing my best to create a route of “friendly avoidance” but you’re obviously not taking my hint.

And for goodness sake (more so your sake than mine, actually), DO NOT EVER, EVER step in front of me and said tot /stroller /armload of bags and ask me your “quick question.” DO NOT BLOCK my exit route from your stall. If I wanted your products in the first place, I’d make a beeline towards you (that does not include when chasing tots who have run to your stuffed animal display).

Thank you for your understanding.

Yang Mommy

PS I also know the days I look harried because I tend to wear a cute hat, so DO NOT say in a loud voice (to be heard over the cacophony of the mall music), “Ma’m, how do you style your hair?” DUH–if I had the time to style it do you really think I’d have slapped on this hat?!

Countdown to Christmas–Week 2

YANG

I’m procrastinating, don’t you know.  I should be doing one of a zillion things that have to get done this week, yet here I am, blogging instead of doing. Well, making a list helps me and I love crossing things off too–such a sense of accomplishment to do that!

Amazingly, I crossed off everything on my holiday to-do list last week (and not because I was fed up but because I actually did them!). The fact that we had our first snow of the season certainly helped put us all in the holiday spirit. This week I thought I could take it a bit easy and frolic in the snow some more until my DH informed me that there are 2 weeks left until the Big Day. Um, I was counting on a few extra days! Alas, although this week is nearly passed, I still am contending with the:

1. Obligatory Christmas Cards: The mere thought of what lies ahead re cards has already exhausted me. At times like this, I wonder if we really need to go through the annual work and expense of sending out Christmas cards. Sure, it’s nice to catch up with  ol’ friends and regail them with all the fun things we’ve done all year, but who wants a form letter  and who has the time to craft one!  And no, I don’t like holiday e-cards for a variety of reasons. So we’ll do the cards but don’t be surprised if it arrives after the Big Day (but definitely before year’s end!).
2. Wrap Gifts: My hiding spot is literally bursting with presents spilling out–either I’ve too many gifts or too small a hiding spot! I really enjoy wrapping gifts but I’m not the type of person to be able to wrap more than say, 5 in a row without going a bit batty. Maybe if I had my own gift wrapping room (and all that luxurious space to spread out the paper, ribbons and bows!) as they did in the olden times, it would be a different story.
3. Find Time to Read a Holiday Story: Yessirree, I’m a sucker for a good historical romance that takes place during Christmas. Can’t help myself! All I need is a good story, a cozy corner and an hour to delve in. Finding that hour will be the tough thing.
4. Prepping for The Next Round of Parties: This past weekend’s parties were kid-free, but the parties this weekend are not. Actually, one social is kid-oriented and another we have no choice but to bring the munchkin. And all parents out there understand the added work that entails! Oh, and I need some hostess gifts …
5. More Duties and Tasks As Assigned: Need I say more? Work deadlines, household stuff, you name it!

So as I approach all that has to be done this week, I will do so with this in  mind–as if I’m eating an elephant which is one bite at a time. And a little rock music in the background too to get my groove going!

Holiday Gift Ideas (& Wrapping Tips) for the Women in Your Life

YIN

Tis the season for giving. And giving. And giving. Doesn’t it seem like you always need an extra gift for someone who shows up with a family member or for a hostess gift when you attend a party? My grandmother used to keep extra pairs of men’s socks on hand just in case one of my great uncles brought over a male friend for Christmas dinner. While you probably won’t want to keep socks on hand (that was in the 40’s and 50’s), it is a good idea to keep some soaps or treats on hand and wrapped because you never know who will pop in.

I like to give things that people will use and enjoy and not give them something just because I found it on sale. And now that I’m a mom I enjoy getting gifts that aren’t child oriented (picture frames and such) because I already have those things and sometimes Mommy wants something just for her. Here are my picks of inexpensive items that aren’t cheap, are great for women (and aren’t child related) and will make the receiver very thankful (Full Disclosure – I work for one of the companies listed below, but I would have listed their item anyway because I really do like it):

Origins Peace of Mind: Stressed out? A few dabs of Peace of Mind will help you relax and get into a peaceful zone. Great for your desk or in a diaper bag. And it’s only $10.

Whole Foods Market: Whole Foods has great gifts for under $10. Two of my favorites are a FEED 100 bag, where the money helps to feed hungry children in Rwanda, and their chocolate truffles.

Red Envelope: They carry a faux leather wristlet for $24.95. Perfect for the sister or friend who doesn’t like to carry a large handbag.

Pier 1: Pier 1 has some great stone bracelets that work for women with a style all their own. They come in different colors and are $12 or $15 each.

Gift Card: I know that some say gift cards are impersonal but I’d rather get a gift card and pick out what I want or need than receive something that I can’t use. Pick one to her favorite store or if you’re keeping presents around “just in case” a gift card to Starbucks, Target or Barnes & Noble come in handy and fit almost all personalities.

Yankee Candle Company: Candles from this company can be a little higher priced than other places, but they smell wonderful lit or unlit and their jars don’t overheat so you don’t have to worry about them scorching your table or breaking from the heat. And right now they’re having a buy one candle at full price, get the second one at 50% off sale. Perfect for two of your friends.

Philosophy Skin Care: Philosophy has a mini holiday lip shine set for $15. With all the kisses that happen over the holidays, we always need to touch up our lipstick!

YANG

Aw, how very thoughtful of Yin’s Grandma! Although I admit I laughed about handing out socks, I commend her for actually having on hand some extra gifts for those drop-ins during the holidays (and since men hardly buy their own socks, socks are good for them!). Yin Mama has a terrific assortment of hostess gifts, so rather than add to that, I thought I touch on the other half of gift-giving–the presentation. After all, presentation is half the battle, they say! (Side note: My father is the master of gift presentation–for instance, he built an actual fruit tree, complete with real fruit and little tree frogs, to wrap his granddaughter’s stuffed blue bird!)

Here are some fun ideas that can touch up little gifts, bring some humor to it all, or just make it a novel presentation.

Wine: Wine given in a wine bag or sock is very pretty, but why not add a laugh to it (if you know the hostess well enough, of course) and wrap the wine in a funky dish washing glove! A busy hostess will need both after throwing a major party.  

CDs & Books: Both of these are pretty hard to conceal; I mean, you know you’re getting a CD or a book right away, you just don’t know what kind. To make the presentation more interesting, wrap the items in paper, but tie up with new ear buds or tape an assortment of bookmarks to the book package.

Plants & Flowers: First, let me just say that while flowers are a wonderful gift, if they’re not already in a vase, they become a pain in the neck, esp if a party is at hand. So please, have flowers already in a vase or plants already in a pot! To jazz them up, why not tie a lovely spring scarf around the base of a potted plant or wind around the vase.

Hand Lotions & Gels: Pretty smelling lotions and hand-sanitizing gels are a must and you can never have enough. Plus, travel-sized items  are the perfect fit to toss into a purse.  So why not toss some into a new purse for your hostess!

Homemade Baked Goods: Depending on what type of treats you bring, there are hundreds of ways to wrap them. Wrap foodie items with a pretty new dishtowel. Perhaps the dishtowel even has a motif that corresponds to the treats you’re bringing, like ginger bread cookies or cupcakes. Alternatively, put treats inside a cute lunchbox!

Candles: Like CDs and books, candles are hard to wrap and usually end up in gift bags. To jazz it up a little, why not use an inexpensive wicker basket and place several candles of different scents and sizes inside, using pine cones and branches as a decorative base.

Gift Cards: Instead of slipping the gift card inside an envelope, why not put it into a small stocking, or taping it to the bottom of a box of chocolates (Godiva!) Just make sure you tell your hostess to look underneath! Another idea is to tape various hard candies (still in their wrapping) to the card, such as mints and lollipops.

One last idea–we use a lot of bows and ribbons to tie off our gifts. But ot make them more personal, I add inexpensive tree ornaments that correspond to the gift itself, or just look good against the background of the wrapping paper.

Just remember, when all is said and done, “it’s not the gift that matters, but the thought that counts.” And if it’s not enjoyable to do, don’t!

Counting Down to Christmas–Week 1

Yang Mommy

Thanksgiving is over and I’m now 10 lbs heavier. Well not really, but that’s what I felt like after pushing myself away from the table on Thursday! Then there was Black Friday and the frivolous yet maddening trip to the shops, wherein I worked off those extra pounds going up and down the aisles. This weekend we also celebrated my daughter’s 2nd birthday and had a great party with family and friends. Which leads me to today…

It’s the morning of Dec 1st and I’m staring at a plethora of wrapping paper that has to be recycled. Out of the corner of my eye I see several mini pumpkins that are past their prime (no implosions yet!). They too will be recycled– into the woods. There is even a squirrel on my deck  hoarding away unwanted carrots sticks and forgotten cookies from the party. 

Sigh. It’s time to get ready for Christmas, isn’t it?

This week’s Premier to-do list includes (but is not limited to):

1. Major cleaning up after party, inside and out (TG for Scooba and leaf blowers!)
2. Removing all vestiges of Fall (ie scurrying around the house to make sure I pack up all the autumn decorations and that said 2 yr old hasn’t hidden any in her toy box.)
3. Getting a tree  (any tips for corralling a tot so she doesn’t climb the tree nor crawl under it whilst putting it up would be appreciated!)
4. Christmas Party #1 to attend (which creates its own sub-list of to-dos, including arranging babysitter, etc)
5. Decorate the house for Christmas (low on the list because as of today, I can’t even contemplate that endeavour!)
6. All other jobs/duties/tasks as assigned (can’t get away from that one.)

So it’s time to get going and get on with things. Yet, it’s so sunny outside and it’s our one dry day of the week, so the weatherman says. Hmmm….maybe a morning walk and trip to the playground is in order instead. The cleaning and decorating can surely wait one more day, and to the squirrel I say “eat and be merry!” :)

Yin

Christmas again. Already! It seems like Christmas was only few months or so ago. I don’t know where 2009 has gone. I just know that it’s gone. But I have accomplished a lot already for Christmas. Here’s my “pat on the back to myself list”:

For the first time ever I got my advent calendar up before December 1st. Woo-hoo! Now if I could just remember to put an ornament up each day I’ll be doing great.

I’ve started my Christmas shopping and even bought toys for the two boys that we selected from the group our church is supporting. I just have to wrap them.

We got the Christmas tree up. Our goal is not have the cat or the child knock it over before the 25th.

I’ve had egg nog and Danish cookies already. Yea!!

We took our daughter to see Santa Claus. My mom would never take us so I always wanted my child to have at least one picture with the jolly old elf. The picture was pretty bad. She was petrified. I guess the shot will be funny when she’s older.

I figured out (what I think is) a good gift for my in-laws this year. They are very hard to shop for and my husband is no help in figuring out a present for them. So, since they love their computer and love taking pictures of their only grandchild, we got them a CD organizer that you can file by number and then press a button and it pulls the CD out. I just hope they think it’s a good gift and they use it.

I’ve decided to take a 3 day weekend the week of Christmas and the week of New Years. I’ve earned it.

I purchased a great CD of a local church playing Christmas music on the steel drums. It’s actually a present for my parents but I’m enjoying it before I send it on it’s way.

So my Christmas season has started off pretty well, if I do say so myself. Hopefully your holiday season will be an inexpensive, fun, family filled, stress free occasion. Okay, stop laughing.

October is Over, Thanksgiving is Here…

Yang Mommy

…I can smell turkey and stuffing so near!

Growing up in a small family, with both parents from Europe, we didn’t really “celebrate” Thanksgiving like most American families. Sure, we watched Santa arrive in the parade and had some turkey for dinner but that was about it for the traditional activities. No large feasts, no touch football in the back yard, no days spent in the kitchen in preparation. Some of my friends thought I was missing out on the big day and I agreed with them. I wanted the big family table, full of laughter and good cheer, with plates piled high with good food–I wanted the quintessential Hallmark holiday.

Yet looking back on my childhood, I realize that although we didn’t have the Hallmark holiday, we really did have a great day, year after year. Because my parents didn’t stress out in the kitchen and because we took the day easily, we spent the day as tight knit close family. Some years we’d all take long walks in the woods, looking for animal tracks. Other years we’d simply go feed the ducks at the local pond, or if we had a white Thanksgiving, we’d definitely go sledding. Those were wonderful Thanksgiving days.

Nowadays, since marrying  into a larger family & having my own little one, our Thanksgivings have become much larger and grander, and more Norman Rockwellish. Add to the fact that we invite family friends over to dinner too and we end up with a 25 lb+ organic turkey on the table with slim chances of leftovers for the weekend! (I admit, my husband and I have on occasion bought our own little turkey breast to have “leftovers” with–I have to have my turkey and cranberry sauce sandwich on Black Friday!) This week is being spent in preparation for Thursday’s big day, with home-made food being whipped up hither and yon. Stress in the kitchen? You bet ya. Fun in the kitchen? Absolutely! Trying to make it all work whilst a toddler runs around pretending to be a turkey–hilarious!

So as I march forth into the kitchen today and well on into the night, and after I’ve trudged through the supermarket crowds, I’ll be reminiscing about my childhood Thanksgivings and looking forward to my grown-up day of feasting (and in the back of my mind, making sure I also have food my tot will eat, LOL!). And I’ll definitely make sure to create  my own special family memories with my little girl and husband on this day of thanks.

…And when it is over and grace has been said, it won’t be the turkey but me stuffed instead!

YIN:

Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays. I’m not quite sure why. I’m not a really big eater. And although I like to cook (when I have time) and read magazines such as Saveur, I’m not a gourmand. I think I really like Thanksgiving because it’s the time of year when you can feel like a kid again and there’s a change in the weather that says “It’s that’s time of year!!”.

Working in retail for the past several years has really changed my Thanksgiving. No more relaxing and do a few things a few days ahead. No completely cleaning out the fridge and scrubbing down the kitchen. No prepping the night before and leisurely going into the day. I’m too busy making sure everyone else has what they need for the holidays.

But even though I’m bone tired after working close to 35 hours in a 3 day span before Thanksgiving, I cooked a full meal this year. The only thing I didn’t make were the mashed potatoes which were pre-made. I brined and cooked a turkey, made some honey carrots, made easy yeast rolls, and for the first time even made a gravy that was tasty and not lumpy (finally!). I did forget the stuffing, but no worries.

So if I was so tired why do all that? Because I wanted my daughter to experience Thanksgiving with her parents. She was only 5 months old last Thanksgiving and we went to my brother’s to eat. This year I made the decision early that we weren’t going to family’s house to have dinner. Not because we don’t like our family – but because my work life was so crazy in the days prior and my husband had to work Thanksgiving morning. So rather than rush around and be cranky and not enjoy the day we had dinner at home and then afterwards went to see my family and had drinks and dessert with them.

I felt guilty at first because my parents were down for the week. However I realized that this was the best thing for my “new” family and my “old” family would enjoy me more if I was relaxed. After yesterday I no longer feel guilty but I feel good because we had the best of both worlds. I got to wake up, have a mimosa and watch the Macy’s parade with my daughter. Then I started cooking, my husband came home and we ate around 3:30pm. After my daughter’s bath (have you seen a 17 month old go at the cranberry sauce?) we headed over and hung out for a few hours with my family. My husband even went to the bar at the timeshare with my dad and they had a couple of beers and some quality time.

So this holiday season, don’t feel pressured to do whatever you don’t want to. You’ll get resentful and it won’t be any fun. Do what is best for your family and if it’s a little different, so what? The idea isn’t to be like Norman Rockwell’s vision. That’s no offense to Yang Mommy and her family – they’re not trying to be like Norman Rockwell’s vision. I think they ARE Rockwell’s vision. They’re a big, close family who loves spending a lot of time together. That’s who they are and they don’t try to be different. But if your family isn’t like that don’t try to fit into a mold that you’re not. Being yourself will make everyone more comfortable and you’ll have a much better holiday season. Enjoy!

Are Kids Menus Really Kid Friendly?

Yang Mommy

Over this past summer, my daughter and I ate out quite a lot. We were either on the go hither and yon, or on vacation, or simply wanted to get out and enjoy a beautiful afternoon outdoors. So our adventures took us to various eateries, from sandwich shops to nice restaurants. Sounds fun, doesn’t it? Well for the most part it was, and is, fun to eat out with her. But as a toddler, she still has those pesky, picky, toddler taste buds.

Experience has now taught me to always, always bring some food I know my daughter will like and that’s good for her. Regardless of the stares and looks the restaurant staff may give me, I will continue to whip out a banana or mini-sandwich for her while kindly asking the wait staff for extra napkins.  The  number one reason I bring food along is not because she’s such a picky eater, which she isn’t really (although she has her moments), but because I’m a picky mom.

It seems the standards on kids menus in America today are: Mac n’ Cheese, Chicken Fingers, Sliders or Hot Dog and fatty sides like fries or chips. In and of themselves, these menu items are not all that bad for occasional treats; my girl loves her homemade mac n’ cheese.  And I’m all for letting her try items off my plate. But what gets me is that the flavoring of these items is often cooked to adult taste bud standards, not little children. Yes, trying new flavors is important, and fun. But if it burns my epicurean tongue, well then…

Take for instance the time we ordered off the kids menu some mashed potatoes. Well the potatoes were the same potatoes they serve to adults, including the garlicky seasoning which was even strong for me, who loves garlic, let alone a 1 1/2 yr old. Then there was the time we ordered her chicken fingers from another establishment and the batter was spiced, greasy and hardly any chicken underneath.  And lest I forget, on vacation we ordered her scrambled eggs for breakfast, another dish she loves at home. I had to protest when it came to our table, not only for the plate being too hot to touch, but also with a dollop of butter still melting on them! Belly ache, anyone?

These days, we still bring food she’ll like with us, but we tend to avoid the so-called kids menu. Rather, we’ll order her a side of fruit or some salad, or even let her pig-out on some fresh bread. From our encounters, we’ve found on average that the general seasoning is just not made in mind for tender palates, nor are the portions, let alone the nutritional value in most menu items.  I guess the same can be said for many adult menu items, can’t they!

So with that in mind, I’ll have to make sure that at this year’s Thanksgiving table, there’s some tot-friendly food items to go  along with the beloved standards.

The Ramifications of Mommy Burnout

YIN:

A few weeks ago Oprah had an episode on about moms who drive drunk with their kids in the car. It was a pretty tragic show and on a topic that strangely enough, my own mother and I had discussed in the past month prior to the show because it was something we’d seen repeatedly on the news.

If you start noticing lately there are have been a rash of mothers caught driving drunk, getting into devastating car crashes while drunk, or falling asleep at the wheel drunk – all with their children and possibly other people’s children in the car with them. Pretty much in my mind I was thinking “what in the world is going on to make all these women drink in the middle of the day and get in the car with their children.” And then it came to me – it has to be burnout.

Oprah had a statistic on her show that DUIs for women have gone up 30% in the past 10 years or so. That’s astonishing. So what has happened since the turn of the century to women? The only thing that pops in my head is that as women, mothers and caretakers we’re always trying to do more and trying to do it better. The result of going, going, going is burnout. Burnout, according to Dictionary.com, is “fatigue, frustration or apathy resulting from prolonged stress, overwork, or intense activity.” And what a lot of people do to relieve stress is to drink. Which feels good so we continue to do it. And it felt good last night so why not this morning? And I can handle my drinking so why not have one at breakfast to take the edge off before I drive the kids to school?

It’s a scary scenario, isn’t it? But one that seems quite easy for someone who is cracking under pressure to fall under. So what do we do? How do we as women help ourselves and help each other deal with the expectations that are thrown at us daily from all angles?

For me I am trying to take things in stride and not work myself to death. This time of year is very busy at my job and I recently realized that I was working a lot of overtime and not knowing it until I looked at my paycheck. Sure the extra money is great but for me it’s not worth the stress. So I’m going to make a pact with myself to try to leave on time and not go in on my days off.

Something else I’ve done is to not always reach for a drink to relax. I’m not an alcoholic but I do enjoy the taste of alcohol and the socialization that goes along with drinking. I can see how the relaxation of drinking could lull you into feeling good and putting your mind in another place. I actually see it more now that I am a mother than before (probably because my stress has grown extraordinarily since I became a mom). So now I’ll have a cup of tea. Or I’ll turn on a really funny sitcom to get my mind off of my troubles (Modern Family, The Middle and The New Adventures of Old Christine are my favorites this season). It works and now when I have a beer or a glass of wine its extra special.

I’ve also learned to get out without my child. Now that’s she’s a little older it’s a little easier to ask a friend to watch her for a few hours so we can get out once in a while. What to do if you can’t get out without your child or you don’t have anyone to watch them? Maybe go to the park or the beach or a kid’s museum. Somewhere the kids can run around and get their energy out and you don’t have to run around after them the entire time. I tried this one last weekend – it works pretty good. And they go down for a nap when they get home (an extra plus).

I’m not sure what we can do for each other as friends except listen and be aware of warning signs of burnout from each other. And it’s not always drinking that happens because we’re at the end of our rope. It could be recreational drugs, verbal or physical abuse or many other things. I think the main thing we as moms need to do is to learn how to take care of ourselves so that we can take care of the people that we love. So simple, yet so hard – don’t you think?

Dumping Friends Online–A Lesson Not to Teach

YANG

Has this ever happened to you? You log on to Facebook or My Space to see that your Friends list has suddenly decreased. Since FB doesn’t tell you who has un-friended you (or tell others when you un-friend them), it can take some guess work to figure out who dumped you and more to the point, why. A boyfriend? An ex-love? A long time girlfriend? Even a family member?

Well much to my amazement this morning, I found out that a long-time friend of mine (we were once best friends back in the college days) decided to un-friend me without even a so much as a “I’m upset with you because of A, B, C.” No, instead this woman chose to take the silent & in my opinion, cowardly, route and simply un-friend me. What hurts the most is that she’s obviously upset with me about something but doesn’t care enough about me or the friendship to come to the table with what’s bothering her. Rather, she cuts ties with me via the Internet. I’m dumbfounded. (I’m not alone either–see this article: http://edition.cnn.com/2009/LIVING/personal/06/04/tf.friendship.breakup/index.html)

This whole sad story of mine got me thinking though. What kind of lessons and values are we teaching children today when we act like this? My daughters is far too young for life lessons on friendship (she’s a toddler), but future Yang Mommy wonders what the world will be like when her daughter is a tween and if dumping friends on-line without even discussing any issues at hand will be considered OK. I surely hope not. Because to me, it’s like putting a child in time-out without telling them why, and then not giving them a chance to correct themself. Perhaps I did something that was a “fatal friend error” but how will I ever know if I’m not told what I did wrong?

What I’ll do now is up in the air. I guess it all depends on how much this friend means (or meant) to me, and if I want to continue a relationship with someone who values our friendship in this manner. I do know that I’ll have a story to tell my girl when she’s older and going through her own trials and tribulations of friendship. My choices today may not be what she will choose to follow tomorrow, but hopefully she will learn something from my tale–that you shouldn’t just cut links with a friend without at least telling them why.

Save a Little Money

YIN:

Even though we’re a two income family, like lots of others right now we’re living on a strict budget. But even before the ecomony went south, I was always a bit of a cheapskate. And proud of it : ) 98% of the time I don’t purchase anything that’s not on sale. I use coupons whenever I can. And I love to get tips on how others save. So here are some of my tips on how parents can save a little money.

–Kid’s eat free: I never understood the greatness of this tip until I had a child. If you’re looking to go out for a break or a treat, only go to places that let your little one pick something off the kid’s menu for free when you purchase something. You can Google ‘kids eat free’ or if you have an iPhone you can get an app for that. Or ask your other mom friends for suggestions. Just be sure to read all the rules and regulations.

–Coupons: Did you know Target (one of my favorite stores) allows you to use one of their store coupons along with a manufacturer’s coupon? What a deal! People have told me they don’t clip coupons because it takes too much time. But it doesn’t take that much time and is well worth it. If you’re not in the mood to clip your own coupons you could always purchase some on eBay (really).

–Clothes: Children’s clothes are expensive. Expensive! It seems like such a waste but I like my daughter to look cute. What’s a cheapskate to do? Go to Goodwill! Find one that is close to a well-to-do area because of course they’ll drop their kids’ clothes off and rich people will purchase high end things. At my Goodwill infant clothes are $1.19 each. I’ve found a mini University of Florida cheerleader outfit (that retails for about $60), clothes with the tags still on them, and a pink Laura Ashley step stool I got for $7. Also try consignment shops or trade clothes with your friends who have children in a similar age range. My daughter even has worn boy’s clothes if I find them at the right price.

–Buy inexpensive, not cheap: There is a big difference between buying something that is inexpensive and something that is cheap. I’ve learned the hard way that cheap things don’t last and you end up spending extra money to replace it. I don’t shop for myself a lot (because I don’t like to go to the mall) but when I do, a lot of times I’ll head to stores like Ann Taylor or Banana Republic and go straight to the sales racks. There are times I’ll find things I wasn’t looking for but I can’t leave behind. An example is a pair of khakis that fit perfectly I got at Banana Republic for $4.99. Of course I don’t find those kind of crazy deals all the time but when I do I don’t let it go. The trick is to shop off season. Guestimate your child’s size for next year and grab that swimsuit in October or that sweater in April.

Do you have any great tips on how you save money for your family? Pass them on – I’d love to hear about them!

P.S. You’ve probably noticed that Yang Mommy didn’t post on this subject. She loves to save too but to post a little more often we’re going to periodically post on our own. Don’t worry – we’ll still be posting together on a pretty regular basis!

Role Reversal Part II–How Green is it on the Other Side

This is a two-part posting to our blog, wherein Yin Mama and Yang Mommy dream about trading their Jimmy Choos—until the other shoe drops!

YANG:

Before I had my daughter, I worked about 50hrs a week in a very stressful job, but one that I enjoyed most of the time. So I know what it’s like to juggle a demanding career and a home life, but not one with a little one thrown in the mix too. So when it all gets a little too crazy for me at home, I wonder what it would be like to be working out of the home again with my daughter under the care of another…..

–Days Off: Ah, being able to actually sleep in and not deal with the stress of work for an entire day. How rejuvenating! Vacation days and weekends just  don’t pack the same punch as they used to now that I’m a SAHM.

–Adult Conversations: I can only answer Dora’s questions so many times convincingly. So I envision I’m talking about the latest in the news or showbiz gossip to like-minded adults while gathering around the water cooler. Scintillating!

–Dressing Up: Wearing nice shoes, dresses, suits, jewelry and better still, needing to update my wardrobe every now and then for the office. Casual clothes are great, but after a while, donning a power suit makes you feel, well, powerful.

–Day Care Bonus of Potty Training: Several of my friends have kids in daycare and there, the staff begins potty training. If I had to go back to work, day care or in-home care would be needed and ha–someone else can deal with the mess!

–Sick Days: I could call in the office and tell them I’m sick (whether I am or not) and get the rest I’d need because again, the little one would be taken care of by someone else.

–Less Interruptions: I could shut my door, put the phone on voice mail and just write, write, write without having a cute little face appear at my knees for something. Luxury!

–A Paycheck! Healthcare!: Need I say more?

–”Ahh,” vs “Oh.”:  As in, “what do you do for a living.” “Ahh, you have an interesting job” vs the often more judgemental, “Oh, you’re at home.”

Yes, I still do occasionally pine for those long, drawn-out status meetings and the weekly bagel delivery (food I didn’t have to prepare!) because it would mean real vacation days, a paycheck and chats that aren’t with dollies. So for those working moms and dads out there, kudos for you for all that you juggle and remember, it’s not always so bad in the working world.

YIN:

I’m sorry but Yang Mommy’s fantasies were amusing to me. The only one I really get to do is have adult conversation, and there are days I wish I didn’t have to communicate with some of the “adults” I work with:

Days Off: What is that? The two days a week that I’m not at work I’m either spending time with my family or trying to get all my errands, laundry, bill paying, etc done that I wasn’t able to do the 5 days that I spent at work or when I got home from work.

Dressing Up: Due to the nature of my job, even though I’m considered a manager, 95% of the time I wear jeans and sneakers to work. It’s not feasible for me to get dressed nice and I can’t wear fancy shoes or cute sandals. Sure lawyers and account executives get to wear nice clothes and shoes to work. But I’d bet that at least 75% of women in the work force either wear some sort of uniform or do work that gets that dirty so they don’t too dressed up on a daily basis.

Daycare/Potty Training: Hey Yang Mommy – if you want to pay me $150 a week to potty train your little cutie, I’ll be up in a few months to start! : ) Yes it’s a bonus but they only do it because by that age the teachers at daycare are rightfully sick of all those diapers.

Sick Days: This one just amuses me. I don’t get sick days. I get Paid Time Off, which is what a lot of companies use. It is good for doctor’s appointments (which with a 1 year old I go to quite a few of), when my daughter gets sick, coming in late because of the Halloween parade at daycare, sick time, taking the car to the shop, vacation days, or even (God forbid) a death in the family. So I don’t use Paid Time Off just because I need a break. Plus if I did I’d just come back to more work to catch up on so what’s the use?

Less Interruptions: Yes, no one ever pages me, stops by to see me without an appointment, calls me, comes in to ask me a question, needs me to speak to a customer about my company’s community involvement, wants me to proof read anything . . .

A Paycheck! Healthcare!: Well I’m technically working 2 jobs and only getting paid for 1. And if you’re married and staying at home with the child most likely you are covered by healthcare under your husband’s healthcare program. If not most likely you didn’t leave a good healthcare program behind otherwise your husband would be a Mr. Mom.

“Ahh,” vs “Oh.”: As heard from my end (my responses are in parenthesis) “Ahh you work? (yes) Who do you leave your daughter with? (she goes to daycare) You left her at daycare at 3 months old??(yes – she enjoys eating and having a roof over her head)? Do you feel guilty? (no – she has to eat and she enjoys daycare)

As you can see there is no easy solution to being a mom period. So next time you’re thinking of picking on that SAHM or you’re at home thinking it would be better to be at the office remember that none of us have it easy at all. So let’s pick on the dads! (just kidding – they’ve got it rough sometimes too)